By Rabbi Aharon Seleh: The Medrash on this week’s Parsha asks: Hashem had commanded Moshe to go fight with Midian, how come Moshe sent others to fight but didn’t go himself? The Medrash answers since Moshe grew up in Midian, he had to show הכרת הטוב, appreciation.
The answer is quite puzzling, after all, Hashem himself commanded him to wage war against Midian? The answer is that the obligation of הכרת הטוב was so clear to Moshe; he knew Hashem had meant others but not Moshe himself.
We are commanded not to reject Egyptians because we were sojourners in their land. Rashi explains even though they killed the boys, they hosted us at our time of need.
One who lacks הכרת הטוב is not allowed to marry into the Jewish nation. This is why Amon and Moav are rejected as the passuk states clearly “because they did not greet you with bread and water on the road when you were leaving Egypt.” They should have related the kindness Avraham showed their ancestor Lot.
Harav Shalom Arush explains, in general, the root cause of all suffering and difficulties is a lack of gratitude. If people would learn to be grateful for everything done for them, the big gifts in life as well as the small ones, they would see a turn around in many areas of their lives. Of course, there are exceptions like when Tzadikim suffer.
Furthermore, he brings down a law called the “law of gratitude.” It works as follows: “if one would truly realize every difficulty, challenge and suffering is for the best and could thank Hashem for 15-30 min daily for a week or two for that suffering, and be fully content that Hashem is doing what’s best for him, the suffering would disappear.” There are thousands of stories about people from all walks of life who have seen this law come to fruition. Maybe you’ll be next.